With a bit of bad luck, a trip can quickly become more stressful than exciting. With a partner, this stress can get worse.
As summer draws to a close, travel is in full swing, and so are interpersonal conflicts over the most ridiculous and annoying things. Think jet lag, missed connections, and bad navigation. Traveling with a partner means there are more preferences and pet peeves to deal with.
Newsweek I spoke to psychotherapist Nicolle Osequeda, founder and owner of Lincoln Park Therapy Group, to get her tips for surviving a long or complicated ordeal. vacation with a partner—and what to do if things already go wrong.
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“By following these steps, you can maintain a healthy and communicative relationship during summer travel with your partner,” Osequeda said.
Discuss travel preferences and styles
The path to a peaceful vacation begins long before departure. Osequeda said open communication when planning a trip sets an important precedent for the vacation itself.
“Discuss and set clear expectations early in the planning phase,” she advised. “Determine specific responsibilities such as purchasing tickets, making reservations, and creating the itinerary.”
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But beyond logistics, Osequeda advocated another conversation: one about travel preferences. Do you like to move quickly or slowly? Is it more important to you to go deep and see less, or to go deep and see more? Are you comfortable ending your days feeling tired? How do you unpack In a hotel room? Here are some of the questions she suggests discussing early on.
“Decide whether to make reservations in advance or be spontaneous, create a detailed itinerary or go with the flow, and choose between spending time alone or spending all your time together,” Osequeda said.
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Give yourself breaks
Despite preparations, tension can build during the trip. Osequeda recommends checking in regularly and taking breaks when things get heated.
“Discuss how to approach situations where one partner needs a break while the other wants to continue exploring,” she said. “Check in with each other regularly to make sure both partners have opportunities to rest and pursue their personal interests.”
Open communication, as in the planning phase, applies here as well. It's important to continue sharing during the holidays, she said, even if the urge may be to turn off of an emotional or logical conversation.
“Share your feelings, needs and expectations, especially if there are delays or frustrations in your trip,” Osequeda said. “Resolve any issues quickly to ensure a more enjoyable trip.”
In case of conflict, she recommends having an “emergency kit” prepared.
“This kit could include things like a list of calming activities, a fun card game, a frustration journal, downloaded movies or shows that can give you some space despite being in the same room,” she said. “Or a fun, planned way to acknowledge your frustrations and reconnect and recharge.”
With these tips in mind, couples can avoid many problems and start resolving their conflicts well before the trip begins. And, if the worst should happen, they can always count on their favorite show to calm them down before setting off on a new adventure.
Not all compatible life partners are compatible travel partners, but with effort and the right strategy, they can definitely come a little closer.
